Losing my bestfriend

Late last year I lost my best friend/soul sister and I was devastated and to this day I still have no real reason as to what went wrong between us. I tried to talk to her face to face and she would not come and meet me and in the end wrote me a card telling me why, in a way, as to her decision.

There was a misunderstanding regarding a cot but it was not worth in my opinion of pulling up stumps on a friendship that has spanned for over 20 years and one that had never had any hiccups or bad words ever over this time period.

I had supported her through numerous breakups, an abortion, miscarriages and her recent marriage issues and in return I received the biggest slap to my face by being told it was over and that we had ‘grown apart’.

It sounds like I haven’t moved on and in some respects I haven’t but in other ways I have as there is no point dwelling on something that I know I can never change. I just feel lost without her and the mutual friends we have that also seem to have disengaged themselves from my life.

One mutual friend has been fine and I showed her the letter and she was shocked at what was written to me and that she thought it was a load of crap and something else was going on. She thought the words were very hurtful towards me and couldn’t believe that she had said what she did.

I am writing this post as I read one the other day on lifeloveandhiccups about friendships and I have had this post in my mind for months and finally decided it was time to share.

I think it is more devastating than losing a boyfriend/partner as there were no real signs of the total cut off that was received and how it was delivered.

All I can say is I miss you Honey and wish you all the best and fingers crossed for you and your husband that it all turns out the way you want it to. I miss you terribly and think about you every day of the week. I will move on but it will take me time and the tears I have shed over this are starting to dry which must be a good sign for me at least.

break up letter

break up letter